The Caskey Family

Marking Time or Making Memories
September 14, 2010, 8:30 pm
Filed under: Adina, grief | Tags: , , ,

Lately I have struggled with just marking time – with feeling like I’m just surviving as a mommy of little ones.  Once one task is done, we are on to the next: eat, sleep, prepare food, bathe, shower, brush teeth (did my oldest really say to me today, “mommy we forgot to brush my teeth”??)  Some days we go to sleep and I realize I haven’t read aloud to one of my children, or spent time snuggling them (which we all love!)  How is it that the things I love most get pushed off ’til last?

Yesterday would have been my mom’s 53rd birthday.  In a matter of weeks I leave 32, living past the age my mother had her first heart attack.  Some days I wonder if I will be here ’til 40 like my mom was.  Micah is just a few months shy of the age that my youngest brother was when my mom died.  Of course my brother has no memory of my mother.  How many days do I have left with my children?  Our lives are short, in comparison to eternity.  What am I doing to point my children to Jesus today?  If I am gone before them, what have I left them to point them to Him then?

So, I sat down tonight and wrote again in their baby books.  Just in case.  We aren’t promised tomorrow.  Being aware of that isn’t morbid, it’s being realistic and honest.  I also realized I hadn’t written a letter to Micah yet.  I have one written for Merry and Elijah for them to read now, or when they get older, whether I’m alive or not.  In that letter I share with them my highest hopes and prayers for them, and of course about my love for them and my love for the God  who made them who I pray they have faith to love and serve someday soon.  In their baby books I try to write all the funny stuff that we forget when they grow up. . .the funny stuff you say you will tell their future spouse, but totally forget when they are old enough to be married!

What do you remember your parents doing to make memories or what memento do you treasure most from your family?  What do you do with your children to show your love in a memorable way?

6 Comments so far
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Why do you make me cry. Most of your blogs do. Its all so true.

Comment by Roseann

Oh Adina! How very true this is. This is what makes me most sad on this earth, that I will some day leave my kids. BUT the most exciting thing is that I will SEE my kids in heaven! What a blessing to know that, as I am sure you do! Make the most of every day! We love you and your entire family. Take care! Anxious to see you in early October for Jeremy to preach at Unity! 🙂

Comment by Lynne Morrow

I am blessed to call you friend. Your model of motherhood inspires me, and it completely blesses my heart. I love you, dear friend– so very much. (And I love your three babies, too!)

Comment by Whitney Walker Alexander

I completely get this post. not bc of the same experience, but a few weeks ago I realized that my parents are now the age my grandparents were when I remember them. and that my great grandparents were the ages that my grandparents are now. AND its just made me realize how much time has gone by and how much i miss being little. and how if i don’t have children soon (not planning on it at the moment) that my children may never get to know my grandparents. its kinda surreal when the little light clicks on and you realize all these things.

What i remember most from my childhood are our family get togethers, and its been one of the hardest things to not be there for. My mom’s side of the family gets together every holiday for picnics and such. AND we always had way more food then we ever needed. but i am so thankful for those times and all the memories I have that go with them!

Comment by Jennifer, Fontana, J

Great post of reminding us to make memories with our kids and husbands. I think it is time for a surprise milkshake for my son–just because I love him. I am challenged to make sure that the “to-do” list does not crowd out the “priority list”. Even if I do one thing a day “just because we love it” it will be a very good thing. Thanks for the reminder.

Comment by Carolyn

I completely agree – 100% 🙂 I love you! I can’t wait to meet your mom one day – We’ll have the BEST tea party ever!!! (((hugs)))

Comment by Mary

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